What happens when two high school girls are mad at each other, and are in the same group?
Everybody else ducks and covers.
Our girls group met today, and we are in the unfortunate situation of a battle royal. The others have all taken sides, and it was evident to anyone who peeked into our room that there was a clear division. Spiteful, hurtful things had been said in the school hallways, words that were scratched deep with the permanency of tattoo ink.
First, as it was clear that it was affecting the dynamic of the entire group, the discussion was guided through a process of allowing each girl to state what she felt had happened. Others were invited to add to this by stating what “the school” was saying had happened. Next came the hard question: “What was your part in what happened?”
The girls were able to reach a point where they were able to say they had some responsibility, that they needed space from their friendship, and that they would be civil to one another in the hallways. There was an immediate release of tension in the room just as the bell chimed.
We will still have to face the inevitable fact that our group is fragmented, and that the trust that was just beginning to develop between members has been squashed beneath this drama. I believe it was far more healthy to work out this situation in a supportive group environment, and hope that it can help these girls to move on from the situation without feeding into it further. No burn books, please!